Yay Abandonment! — ceci loves me

Excited About Abandonment!

Yup, you read that correctly… Intrigued? Me, too….

See, I’m going through some transitions in my life both personal and professional. These days, it’s kind of hard to separate the personal from the professional. I, like so many of us, learned (through over 30 years in the “corporate world, 10+ in international banking) that we are “supposed” to keep them separate.

And yet, from the perspective of dis-ease or un-ease in the body with respect to emotions, I wonder if that’s part of the problem, part of the reason that so many of us wind up with trapped emotions causing physical and meta-physical problems.

We have learned to compartmentalize… And… that compartmentalization causes blocks. The image comes to me of a big apartment building with lots of block-shaped apartments, each holding an emotion or an experience “separate” from the others. And yet, they are not separate. They are each what make up the whole building. In fact, without them, there’d not be an apartment building…

What if part of the healing were to allow them out to mix and mingle and play with each other? Might there actually be a community…?

What if the paradigm shifted and we made it good, OK, VALUABLE even, for our emotions to move and interact?

What if the solution were not in keeping personal and professional separate?

What if we understood, as Meg Ryan’s character in “You’ve Got Mail” did that when interacting with a person, it’s all personal?

Joe Fox: It wasn't... personal.
Kathleen Kelly: What is that supposed to mean? I am so sick of that. All that means is that it wasn't personal to you. But it was personal to me. ...
Joe Fox: Uh, nothing.
Kathleen Kelly: Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.

So – what does this have to do with Abandonment?

In Emotion Code, the trapped emotion of Abandonment refers to “being left alone (physically); left behind or deserted….Emotional abandonment is being given up on; withdrew from; emotionally deserted or separated from; a feeling of being “left behind” in a non-physical form.”

And, recently, I’ve been clearing some trapped energy around feeling abandoned by my manager at my 9-5 gig. He’s leaving the territory for “bigger and better” in another country. I’m left here in the Big Apple and at loose ends for the moment. And…some of his feedback has been that I’m “too emotional” in the office.

I’ve decided I’m not going to change that. For YEARS, I’ve worked hard to accept my emotions – in all their flavors and colors and expressions.

My manager may not know how to respond to my emotions, but I’m not making him responsible for them. They are mine. I love them. I love my emotions because I love me. And, in loving me and my emotions, I’m a better person. I love the person I am as I’m able to connect with other persons.

And – Merriam Webster offers another definition for abandonment: “the carefree freedom from constraint”. WHAT??? Look at that? Take down my walls, my compartmentalization of a definition – and I see a VALUE in abandonment.

How about embracing with ABANDON all of me? ALL that is happening: all the sadness, all the confusion, all the doubt, all the frustration, all the ENERGY – and dancing with ABANDON…what might that open up for me?

Hope to see you soon – on the dance floor of life!